AND THE GRADES ARE IN . . .

Weeell . . . lets just say I didn't do as well this semester as I'd hoped. I actually did BETTER than I thought I would, but not what I had hoped.

See, last semester, I had the bright idea to try to have computer science as one of my concentrations.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!!
Yeah, that was pretty dumb on my part.

So now, I have two "D's" and an "F" on my record. YIKES.

That's okay, really I was expecting to fail everything, so I was actually pretty stoked about the "D's".

So where do I go from here? Where I should have been all along.

History.

Medieval British and European History to be exact.

Why you may ask?
Simple -

I am an English major. I have over 60 hours of literature under my belt. Over half of those hours are in British or European literature. And what goes hand in hand with Literature? History! Why? Because every writer in history has written about the society at that time. Weather they meant to or not, every piece of the written word is steeped in historical context and meaning. Therefore, I already have a head start.

Plus, c'm on . . . I'm a RENNIE!! Medieval history is my thing, man! :-)

Christmas soapbox . . .

I love the holidays. I love everything about the Christmas season. The lights, the carols, the colors, the smells, the joy, the giving, the weather (even though right now it's not really Christmas weather . . . grr), the food, EVERYTHING! Well, there is ONE little EEENSY WEENSY thing that gets to me.

HAPPY HOLIDAYS

Now, if I say "Merry Christmas" I expect one of a few answers: "Merry Christmas" from someone that celebrates Christmas, "Happy Hanukkah" from some of my Jewish friends, "Happy Kwanzaa" from someone who celebrates that, but NOT "HAPPY HOLIDAYS". I'm sorry, but "MERRY CHRISTMAS" does NOT warrent "HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!!"

Want another rant?

Nativity scenes/Christmas trees are not being allowed in some town squares. Why? It might offend someone. A star of David, a Menorah, Kinara (Kwanzaa candle holder), or other non-Christian symbol couldn't possibly be offensive, but a CHRISTMAS TREE COULD BE??? HUH?? Soooo . . . let's get this straight . . . It's okay to take Jesus out of the season, because, heaven forbid we might piss off the atheists, but we can include EVERY OTHER RELIGIOUS ICON THAT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH CHRIST????

Is it me . . . ? Or is this lacking some shred of equality?

Don't misunderstand, I'm GLAD that everyone else gets to have thier symbols displayed. I LIKE diversity!! I would just like for MY beliefs to be included in the diversity!

Okay, I'm done now.

Maybe tomorrow I'll have a much more cheerful CHRISTMAS posting.
If I'm over this, that is . . .

Being Thankful . . . Again . . .

As Thanksgiving Day looms over the horizon, I am reminded once again of things that I need to remember daily to thank God for. We need to take a step back and remember to be thankful ALWAYS - not just one day a year. Here's my list of what I'm thankful for . . .

I am thankful . . .

. . . For my God and my Savior
. . . For my wonderful husband
. . . For my amazing children - all four of them
. . . For family and friends
. . . For computers and internet
. . . For television and Dish Network
. . . For food on my table and clothes on my back
. . . For a roof over my head
. . . That Ronnie is able to work and has a job
. . . That I am able to continue my education
. . . That I am not a turkey, cranberry, green bean, or potato this time of year
. . . That I can love
. . . That I AM loved
. . . For cell phones
. . . For puppies and kittens
. . . For Jeff Dunham (Jefah-fah Dun-Haaam . . . dot coommmm)
. . . To be alive and healthy

Love to you all.
Have a safe and happy Thanksgiving!!!

Two Years . . . and counting!

I ment to post this the other day, but life (as usual) has been crazy!!:

Just over three years ago, I met a wonderful man. He had two children, didn't mind that I had a child, and was a musician. We started talking, and became friends. Briefly. Then, he and I met face to face for the first time. The next day, we had lunch. The night after that, we had our first date - and our first kiss. I felt butterflies in my stomach that I had never felt before. From that day forward, we were almost inseperable. We saw each other almost every day after that - and didn't spend more than two days away from each other. Three months later we were engaged.

Two years ago, on the anniversary of our first date, my father walked me down the aisle to meet this man face-to-face. Well, pulled is a more accurate description. I remember how handsome I thought he looked in his black suit. And how cute and nervous he looked. I remember thinking how much I loved him and was so thankful for him. And how I couldn't wait to be his wife.

As we took our vows, I was close to tears. I had resigned myself years before to the fact that I may be alone for the rest of my life. I focused on my daughter and my education. I never thought God had someone in mind for me. But He did. And I stood before him in awe of my love for him and his for me. When he took my hand to put the ring on my finger, I felt the same butterflies in my stomache from our first kiss. I loved him so much - more than I had ever loved any man I had ever known.

Almost a year later, we welcomed the birth of our child together. We now had four children - our family was complete. And I looked at him as he held our son for the first time, and the butterflies were back.

Now, it's been two years since our wedding day and just over a year since our son was born. I looked at him the other night - our anniversary - and felt those silly butterflies again. I snuggled into him as we sat on the couch watching TV. Thanking God for him.

I love my husband so much. And I praise God every day for bringing him to me!

"A change gon' come . . . "

One of my favorite songs of all times says "It's been a long time comin', but a change gon' come". It's a beautifully lyricked song that rips your soul out and stomps on it. We (this country) has been in need of a change for eight long years. We have delt with an incompetent president whose kneejerk reaction is to shoot first, ask questions later. He was so focused on war and being the bigger and better nuclear-equipped country, that he forgot what was REALLY important - his American people. In his mind, sending thousands of innocent men and women overseas to die was justified - it was for the safety of American soil. But he forgot that safty doesn't always mean fighting the bad guy. Sometimes it means that everyone has enough money to eat on or buy a tank of gas with. Granted, in the last stint of his presidency, Bush sent everyone money. This was supposed to up the economy - but it failed poorly. It just wasn't enough. It's not enough to say "Whoops, my bad" and send a check for a quarter (or less) of what we REALLY needed to bring up the economy.


John McCain had the potential to bring us out of Bush's mistakes. He would have helped the economy drastically by doing what Bush (well, and all politicians, really) was afraid to do - taxes. While right now people think that taxes will be the downfall of the economy, the truth is, right now there's just not enough in the government to help the economy. We have to help ourselves first. I believe that McCain would have brought the American government up to Regan's standards and we would have been better off (after two years) than we have been in a long time.

Now, I'm not economist, but if I'm not mistaken, there is no quick-fix to an economic downfall, so why would Bush think there would be?

But I digress . . .

Let's talk about last night. November 4, 2008 was the most historical presidential election in American history. For the first time ever, a black man was voted into office as president of the United States. I did not vote for Barack Obama. Not because he's black - I am actually thrilled to have a black man in office - it's proof positive of how far this country has come in the last 100 years. Not because of the rumors in regards to his Muslim lineage and potential Muslim beliefs. I think that a Muslim has every potential to be a good president as any Christian (now granted, if religion were the ONLY deciding factor between candidates, I would of course vote the Christian, hands down, but that's another blog).

I did not vote for Obama because I simply felt that HE IS NOT READY FOR THE PRESIDENCY. He truly has the potential to be a good president - some day. And the oval office is not a training center. Let's face it, he's a classy guy. When asked about his opinion on Sarah Palin's daughter, his response was "We decided that family is off limits." That takes class. And he has some wonderful ideas in regards to health care and social security. But I am not sure he has the capabilities to clean up the mess Bush has left behind. McCain admonished Bush publically on more than one occasion - I KNOW he was unhappy with the Bush administration and had already gone through the motions of trying to pick up some of the pieces - even before the announcement of the candidates for the caucus. Obama, on the other hand, well . . . I'm not sure he's ready to lead the troops out of Pakistan and Iraq. Let's not forget the faux pas he made when visiting the troops (didn't even shake the hands of the soldiers and stayed hidden in the captain's tent the whole time .. . tisk tisk tisk - and in an ELECTION year Barak . . .). He's been very verbal about his stand against even BEING there. He'll probably pull them all home at once, and then the Middle East will crumble horribly.

On that note, I prayed that McCain would win this election - God chose to put Obama in office in stead. So I guess all we can do now is sit back, relax, and pray that he doesn't get us bombed . . .

God is so good!

Well after this heck of a week, we get a phone call from our landlord telling us that she has a plumber coming out RIGHT THEN. We rush out to meet them at our house. The plumber (Keith's Plumbing from Nocona, to give him a plug) found where the pipeline went, did a little digging, and found out that we have another (hidden) cleanout close to the house. He runs his rooter through, and pulls out a wad of roots the size of my arm!!

With our pipes clear, we run out to check the mail.

Ronnie has recieved a check for an overpayment of child support - $152 worth!!

THEN I notice ANOTHER check in the mail - for me, from my OB/GYN - this was from a credit I had from Jake's birth.

It was, get this, $1094!!!!

ALL our prayers have been answered!!!

We will be able to 1) Pay off all our bills, 2) go to TRF with room to breathe, and 3) have enough left over to put up in savings for the next unforseen emergency.

He is SOO GOOD!!!

Being Thankful . . .

Have you ever spent a single day of your life not being able to take a shower, wash dishes or clothes, or even go to the bathroom or brush your teeth?

We are so there.

Our sewer is messed up. REALLY messed up.

I am looking at this and saying, Okay God, what are you trying to teach me THIS week . . . then it hit me. THANKFULNESS. I have been so set on the things that I DON'T have lately that I forgot to take a step back and remember the things I DO have.

For example, Ronnie's company went to three day work weeks. He was offered a position that will give him a larger salary during this time. That, and the partial unemployment check he will be getting, puts us back where we need to be in order to pay our bills and stay on track. THEN, the ENTIRE plant went to a two week furlow (temp layoff) EXCEPT his section and one other. If that's not God, I don't know what it.

And yet, instead of being thankful for what God has granted us, I have been whiney about "oh, we don't have a second car" or "oh we only have one bathroom" or something else silly and insignificant.

So now, instead of ONE bathroom, we have NO bathroom.

God is chastizing me . . . And you know what? I'm THANKFUL for it. See out of this, I have learned a very valuable lesson. Life is not about the HAVE-NOT's. It's about seeing the little things God gives us on a daily basis, and counting those blessings. It's about saying thank you every once in a while for that little butterfly or that shooting star . . .

I am looking at what we're going through right now, with the job situation and the sewar situation, and seeing it in a whole new light. Now, I am THANKFUL because Ronnie and I are going through this TOGETHER - as a team. I have the man I love beside me, loving me and supporting me through it all. I have him to hold on to in the midst of a nervous breakdown (of which I have had at lest three this week). I am also thankful because we have God on our side. And like my husband, I have Him to lean on and talk to.

So, as I stare at the unflushable toilet today and pack our bags to stay at my mother's until we have a usable bathroom, I am still THANKFUL.

God's Will

Sometimes I have to step back and ask myself, "what is it that God is asking of me?" Right now, I know that God is asking for sacrifice, and I am more than willing to make that sacrifice, I just don't know WHAT to sacrifice, see? Is it the cable and the internet? Is is all our "stuff" that just seems to accumulate in the corners of our house consistantly? Is it the cabinet full of canned goods that I'll probably never use? Is it our house? Our freedom?

See, I'm one of those Christians that occasionally needs a good kick in the butt. God has to be really streightforward with me and pretty well yell what He wants, otherwise I just don't get it. It's not that I don't listen. It's not that I don't pray about it. I just need it to be shoved in my face sometimes.

WOW.

Thank you Mary, for sending this.

The following was written by Ben Stein and recited by him on CBS Sunday Morning Commentary.

My confession:

I am a Jew, and every single one of my ancestors was Jewish. And it does not bother me even a little bit when people call those beautiful lit up, bejeweled trees, Christmas trees.. I don't feel threatened. I don't feel discriminated against. That's what they are: Christmas trees. It doesn't bother me a bit when people say, 'Merry Christmas' to me. I don't think they are slighting me or getting ready to put me in a ghetto. In fact, I kind of like it It shows that we are all brothers and sisters celebrating this happy time of year.

It doesn't bother me at all that there is a manger scene on display at a key intersection near my beach house in Malibu . If people want a creche, it's just as fine with me as is the Menorah a few hundred yards away.

I don't like getting pushed around for being a Jew, and I don't think Christians like getting pushed around for being Christians. I think people who believe in God are sick and tired of getting pushed around, period.

I have no idea where the concept came from that America is an explicitly atheist country. I can't find it in the Constitution and I don't like it being shoved down my throat.

Or maybe I can put it another way: where did the idea come from that we should worship celebrities and we aren't allowed to worship God as we understand Him? I guess that's a sign that I'm getting old, too. But there are a lot of us who are wondering where these celebrities came from and where the America we knew went to.

In light of the many jokes we send to one another for a laugh, this is a little different: This is not intended to be a joke; it's not funny, it's intended to get you thinking.

Billy Graham's daughter was interviewed on the Early Show and Jane Clayson asked her 'How could God let something like this happen?' (regarding Katrina) Anne Graham gave an extremely profound and insightful response. She said, 'I believe God is deeply saddened by this, just as we are, but for years we've been telling God to get out of our schools, to get out of our government and to get out of our lives. And being the gentleman He is, I believe He has calmly backed out. How can we expect God to give us His blessing and His protection if we demand He leave us alone?'

In light of recent events... Terrorists attack, school shootings, etc. I think it started when Madeleine Murray O'Hare (she was murdered, her body found a few years ago) complained she didn't want prayer in our schools, and we said OK. Then someone said you better not read the Bible in school . The Bible says thou shalt not kill, thou shalt not steal, and love your neighbor as yourself. And we said OK.

Then Dr. Benjamin Spock said we shouldn't spank our children when they misbehave because their little personalities would be warped and we might damage their self-esteem (Dr Spock's son committed suicide). We said an expert should know what he's talking about. And we said OK.

Now we're asking ourselves why our children have no conscience, why they don't know right from wrong, and why it doesn't bother them to kill strangers, their classmates, and themselves.
Probably, if we think about it long and hard enough, we can figure it out. I think it has a great deal to do with 'WE REAP WHAT WE SOW.'

Funny how simple it is for people to trash God and then wonder why the world's going to hell Funny how we believe what the newspapers say, but question what the Bible says. Funny how you can send 'jokes' through e-mail and they spread like wildfire but when you start sending messages regarding the Lord, people think twice about sharing. Funny how lewd, crude, vulgar and obscene articles pass freely through cyberspace, but public discussion of God is suppressed in the school and workplace.

I knew I loved Ben Stien for a reason.

And the #1 Cause of Atheism Is . . .

Christians.
Don't believe me? Ask any Atheist you know why they chose that path rather than Christianity.

Christ never pushed his beliefs on anyone. Those that wanted to listen, did. Those who didn't, didn't have to. He wanted people to come to him WILLINGLY. Not to be forced guiltily into it by someone yelling at them about hellfire and damnation.

His deciples came to him from their own free will. Those that were chosen, were chosen for their willingness. He never told Peter that he was going to go to Hell if he didn't follow the Lord. Mark either. And John, Matthew, Bartholomew, Andrew, James, Philip, Thomas, James, Simon, Thaddeus, and even Judas came willingly when called. They weren't yelled at. They weren't bereted consistantly. They weren't bullied into believing.

What's my point to all this?
You can't force faith.

It's either there, or it's not.

If someone comes willingly and asks about my faith or my relationship with Christ, I will be more than happy to share with them all I know and then some.

If they aren't interested, that's okay. I'll save the bible verses for someone that is.

It's not that I don't believe in being a Witness. I do. It's just that I firmly believe that with some people, it's a losing battle.

They'll come willingly when their called.

I did.

Birth Control Updated . . . Again . . .

Well, I started The Pill Sunday. I have been very emotional. See, the whole premise is to make your body think it's pregnant, right? So hormones are going 90 to nothing. I didn't like the whole idea, but right now it's the only choice. Until my BMI gets to be 40 or less, that is.

I have been doing okay with the weight loss, but honestly, I feel like crap. Now, last weekend wasn't so great on the whole WW losing weight thning. So I can't tell if it's the hormones or the crappy food I've been eating.

Why I don't talk politics . . .

Well, my views do not appear to reflect the views of (most) of the people around me. Its sad really, but one of the main reasons I'm voting for McCain is b/c of one issue that I feel very strongly about. Sometimes I am the lone republican in a circle of democratic friends.

I don't like getting into pollitical debate. People disagree, and that's cool. I won't try to push my beliefs on you, so don't try to push yours on me. But as I was watching Obama last night, I couldn't help but wonder "why would anyone vote for this man?". He's cunning, he's wiley, and I detect a note of dishonesty in his eyes. He was making promise after promise . . . promises that he can't possibly keep because it's really not up to him - it's up to the senate and congress. Ronnie turned to me and said "he makes sense". Yes in some ways, he does. But then, he also stands for something that goes against every moral fiber in my entire being.

Those of you that know me know what I am talking about. I might consider voting for him, if he didn't support the sensless murder of innocents. I might consider voting for him if keeping infantcide legal wasn't on his agenda. But he's a democrat. So that won't change. For that reason, neither will my vote.

I'm voting McCain. You may throw stuff now.

It's so quiet around here . . .

Em's first day was today. LOL, she put her backpack up and went right over to the table to start her cutting work. Completely forgot me until I said, "hey, can I have a hug please?" And Jake said, "Ai-yi-yi-yi-da-do?" Which sounded suspiciously like "I-I-I-dat too?"

The silence is almost deafening, b/c he is taking a nap. NICE, but deafening. And I've gotten to do some much-needed cleaning. And reading for class. All I have are computer classes this semester, and I'm STILL doing more reading than in any of my Lit classes!! What gives??

And it begins . . .

Tomorrow the school year officially begins. My first class is at 9:30 am. I am taking three classes this semester - all computer. This is the first semester in my ENTIRE COLLEGIATE CARREER that doesn't entail an English or literature class. It's going to be very strange for me. But I digress. I am looking forward to this semester. It promises to be a great one. A class on networking. A class on database design and matenince. And a class on Java programming. It's going to be a challange. But I am up for it.

Em's first day is Tuesday. Pre-K. One more year until the dreaded Public School Kindergarten rears its ugly head and I have to allow my little bluebird to fly completely on her own. I don't know what I'm going to do when that day comes. Thank God I don't have to think about that . . . Yet. That won't stop me from worrying though. *sigh* - two days is hard enough. Will I survive with five?

So now it's another year, and more learning. In may I graduate from college, and my baby girl graduates from Preschool. A year ahead of growth. I am looking forward to it.

Birth Control Updated.

Well, looks like the pill for me. Apparantly I'm too FAT to have Essure done in office, and would have to do it in the OR, which we can't afford right now. I am very NOT HAPPY about this. I'll have to talk more about this later, as I can't type through the tears . . .

Birth Control . . .

Well, it's time. I thought about the birth control pill - I thought REALLY HARD about the birth control pill, and decided that it wasn't worth the risk. And since NFP is not an option for "Fertile Myrtle" and spouse, we have decided to go with PERMANENT BIRTH CONTROL. Now, I have thought about tubal ligation (getting my tubes tied), and Ronnie has thought about the big "V", but neither of us are really comfortable with either method. But I was willing to go under the laproscope. So, I went to see Dr. Smith (yes, Wendy's Dr. Smith, LOL). She introduced me to something completely different. It's called essure. Basically there's no cutting, laproscopes, pricking, or blood (this is always good). It's actually an interesting procedure for anyone who can stomach watching the video, LOL.

So am I SURE that I don't want anymore kids? Well, yes. Pretty well, anyway. I look at it this way. In five years, if I want another child, we can always adopt. Or we could take one of Wendy's kids - she has plenty . . . (LOL-I am KIDDING Wendy!!).

So there it is. In the open. No more kiddos for Jenni-Jen-Jen . . .

Love is in the Air . . .

Wow, in two days I have learned that both my brothers are in love. Whodathunk? Apparantly brother 1 has already set the date. Brother 2 asked my mom for a ring to propose with (one of hers - how amazingly romantic is THAT??). I met brother 1's love interest yesterday - she is remarkable. I am looking forward to meeting brother 2's girl . . . someday . . .

New blog

Hey guys, in addition to this blog, I will be keeping track with my weight loss in another blog. Here's the link:

http://supermomlosingit.blogspot.com

I would love for everyone to come and join my journey - I need all the support I can get.

Weight Watchers

I signed up for weight watchers online today. It's time. I also ordered our excersize bike today. It's time for THAT too. I am so ready to start this, I can't wait!! I need prayer, y'all. I need the willpower. So does Ronnie. I know we can do it, with each other there . . . *sigh. This WILL work.

Sometimes . . .

I look at my children and wonder "what are they thinking?"

Like when Emily is jumping on the couch afer being told repeatedly that it will fall apart.

Or when Christin puts an empty pitcher in the refrigerator.

Or when Garrett leaves his toys in the girls' room and then proceeds to be upset that Emily was playing with it.

Or when Jake stares at me when I say "no no, Jake" and grins . . .

I love my kids. They are all just like me.

10 years . . .

http://www.dallasnews.com/sharedcontent/dws/dn/latestnews/stories/081208dnmetdorsey.43a6cf8.html

This is a link to an article about a man who impacted my life and the lives of others 10 years ago in Dallas.

He is a brutal madman.
He is a killer and a taker of innocence.
He knows what he has done to dozens, and does not care.

One of the victims they speak of in the article was a dear friend to me. I dated him off and on for years in high school, and even when we weren't together he was one of my very best friends. I mourned for him for several years before getting on with my life, and I have close friends that still have a hard time letting go.

Brad was an amazing person. He had this uncanny ability to make you feel better when you were down. I remember when he passed, my first thought was, "who's going to make me laugh now?".

Leon Dorsey stole that from me. He stole that from a lot of people.

I remember the funeral clearly. Brad's mom was in the front row, she looked numb. When they began to lower his casket into the ground, Aimee (a dear childhood friend) collapesed. They played his favorite music - we all sat together and sang with it.

The thing that impacted me the most then, and still does now, is the fact that the last time Brad and I spoke on the phone, we had an argument. A week later, I called to talk to him, and his girlfriend at the time answered. She wouldn't let me speak to him. Two weeks later, I was devastated.

This brings to mind an interesting thought. If you are not a supporter of the death penalty, you should probably stop reading now.

Leon Dorsey is getting his final judgement. He was an evil man - the article clearly states that through his actions and his own words. He felt no remorse. He didn't kill for money, or for need. He killed for the sheer sick enjoyment of the kill. When he reaches heaven, he will be turned away. He never allowed Christ to touch his heart. I pray that he finds Christ today. That some epiphany washes over him and he realizes the people he hurt were innocent. I pray that he asks for forgiveness for his sins. I pray that he finds the error in his ways and repents. I don't think any of these prayers will be answered.

Does he deserve to die? That's really not my judgement call. The Bible says "an eye for an eye". Well, by that law, God's will is being fulfilled. I am glad he is being executed. That is so horrible for me to say, I know, but if you felt what I felt. If you went throught what the families have gone through . . . I am glad he will never be allowed to hurt another person again. I wish I felt differently. I wish I could say "oh life in prison is enough. That way he can sit and think about it until he dies an old man". But you see, he won't sit and think about it. He truly doesn't care. So for that reason, I am glad.

It's been 10 years coming.

Recipe!!

Okay so you would think that after yesterday's ramblings I would have something really healthful and low-cal. Well, let me tell you - once a month I really really need something sweet and gooey and fattening and yummy. That time frame started yesterday. So, I made cookies!! Yes, I know. They go against everything I spoke about yesterday, but darnit, I am woman! I need sweets when my hormones are raging! So, anyway, I developed this recipe not thinking it would actually work, LOL, but it did. These things are sweet, caramelly, buttery, lacy, thin . . . okay I need one for breakfast now . . .

Supermom's Everything But The Kitchen Sink Cookies

Yeild:

A ton. I made about 20 cookies and only used about 1/3 of the batter, so I'm going to guess around 60 total.

2 sticks softened butter (I actually used Smart Balance's blend that has 50% heart healthy spread and Omega 3's added)
1/2 c white sugar
1 1/2 c brown sugar
3 eggs
1 1/2 tsp. vanilla
2 T milk

2 c flour
1 1/2 tsp baking powder
1 tsp baking soda
1 tsp salt
1 1/2 tsp cinnimon (my secret - shhhhh!)

1 bag simi-sweet chocolate chips
1 bag toffee bits (Heath bar makes some - find them right next to the mini-m&m's and the mini reeses pieces)
1 c walnuts

In a large bowl, cream butter and sugars until well blended. Add eggs and mix until light and fluffy. Add vanilla and milk and blend thoroughly.

In another bowl, whisk or sift together all dry ingredients. (I put them in the bowl and whisk them) Add dry ingredients to your wet ingredients and mix by hand until blended well. Add chocolate, toffee, and nuts. Mix well. BATTER WILL BE SORT OF LOOSE. DON'T FREAK OUT.

Drop by the spoonful (about a T for each cookie) on to a parchment paper lined cookie sheet and bake at 350 until slightly golden on top (about 5-7 minutes). If you find the bottoms burn, drop the heat to 325.

Diet Ramblings

Okay so, the diet is going . . . well, not as well as I had hoped. I have a ton of excuses, but none of them are relevent. Fact is, i WANT to eat better. I LOVE to eat well. I feel better, I look better . . . but I don't want to get anyone burned out. That's when "diets" fail. You get burned out eating the same thing over and over again. And that's where we're going to be at, culinarily, b/c that's where we're at, financially. We have enough to get by - our bills are paid, we have clothes on our back and food on our table. But unfortunatly, to eat the way I WANT to eat - mostly organic and vegitarian - well, that's a little out of our price range. We're lucky enough to be on WIC - without it, we'd be in trouble.

Another issue is I keep getting conflicting things from outside sources. Soy milk, for example. One source says to keep it away from children. One says to just keep it away from men. Others say it's good for EVERYONE, and still others say it's not good for ANYONE. So who do I believe? Which source is correct and which one is wrong? Another example is grains vs protien. One source believes high-fiber grains with limited amounts of lean protein is the way to go. Another says that high amounts of lean protein is ideal, and tiny amounts of whole grains are best.

I've done YEARS of research on nutrition. I know what's good and what's bad. I can tell you the top ten "super foods" and why their super. I can give you the lowdown on anti-oxidents and vitamins. I know what I should eat, and what I should give my kids . . . So . . . Maybe I'm worrying TOO much about it . . . Maybe I should just do what I think is best and smile at everyone and say "thanks for the advice" and go about my business . . .

I look every day at what people are feeding their kids. I see myself poisoning my children on a daily basis. Hot dogs, cold cuts, red meat, white bread and rice and pastas, pizza, fried foods. Why do I do this? Is it because it's easier than confrontation with a four-year-old? I try to teach her good eating, but she won't eat the good stuff. I'm lucky if I can get an apple or a carrot down her on occasion - forget about anything green. She won't even eat a potato that's not in french fry form. It's not for lack of trying. i've been giving it too her ALL HER LIFE - she STILL won't eat it. All those "experts" that say it takes 13 tries for a child to like a new food have never met MY child. If I give her the good stuff every meal, she won't eat. I can't stand to starve my child, and essentially that's what I feel like I'd be doing. Of course my parents don't help - giving her chicken nuggets, corn dogs, chips, and mac and cheese at their home. She asked for a salad the other day, and I thought my jaw would drop. Then she got mad b/c I wouldn't put crutons or bacos on it. That's all she wanted. Not the salad. The crutons and bacos.

And then there's my hubby. Bless him, I know for a fact he wants to get as healthy as I do. He will eat whatever I put in front of him. But then, I know what he desires from the kitchen. He likes shrimp. Fried. He likes chicken. Fried. He likes fish. Fried . . . well I can get him to eat roasted or grilled chicken. Dark meat chicken. He doesn't like white meat.

So where does that leave me? I am so tired of looking at myself in the mirror. All I see is fat. I disgust myself. And I refuse to make two meals. So . . . now what?

The End Is Near! (Not a Religious Statement)

I went to TWU yesterday to see about changing majors. Well, needless to say, if I had stayed on my current track, I would have finished in May 2010, with the way TWU's scheduling system goes. But, after talking to a wonderful advisor, filing some paperwork at the registrar's office, and going over schedules, it is done!! I am no longer an English major, I am now a General Studies major. I am no longer graduating in 2010, but now, ladies and gentlemen, I am graduating in MAY!!!! W00T!! That's right. 18 hours. That's it. I have three classes this semester, and three next semester. I am going to FINALLY do this!!

This brings me to a preachy moment. I have heard women saying, "Oh, i can't go back to college, I can't afford it/I'm a SAHM/I don't have the time/yadda-yadda-yadda" Okay, all those excuses are BS!!!! It took me 14 - YES, 14 years (by the time I walk across the stage)!!! I started in 1995. But I did it! Sometimes I could only take one class at a time. I had to take a few semesters off due to moving to Austin, legal troubles, pregnancy, wedding, pregnancy, baby, etc. It was slow going. But I did it.

So if you think it's not possible, think again!!

So, just FYI, the next person that comes up to me and says "Oh I just can't . . ." I will tell you to your face that that's a cop-out. Just be warned . . .

On a side note, after a week of feaver, night wakings, screaming, crying, rashes, diarrhea, swollen gums . . . we now have FOUR teeth instead of TWO!

4 nights of screaming $0, but really annoying
3 days of high (101) feaver $0, but a little scary
2 bottles of feaver reducer $8
1 case of roseola $0 - but unnerving for mom

Finally getting it all done and over with . . . until the next tooth, anyway?


. . . Priceless

Hmmm . . . I need some chocolate.

Okay so I have come to terms with the fact that I am fat. Not just fat. I am FAT. I gross myself out. Thank God I have Ronnie in my life rather than some shallow guy that wants a stick insect for a wife. Sometimes I wonder how he crawls into bed with me . . .

So I have made a choice. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I make this choice once every couple of months, but this time I really MEAN IT!! Beginning with my next shopping trip, my family and I will be "clean eaters". No red meat. Very little chicken. Lots of fish, veggies, and fruits. A few whole grains - NO refined ANYTHING . . . I am even thinking very seriously about omitting dairy. Now, I know that would send Ronnie into shock, so I am thinking very hard about weather I want to go that route or not . . .

Theres a TV show on BBC America called "you are what you eat". The woman who does this show is named Gillian McKeith. Although I don't have this channel (yet) I have become addicted to this show. I went to this web site and printed out all the recipes. I am a little frightened, though. She uses things like star fruit and soy milk and courgettes - I don't even know what the heck a courgette is! And I know some of this stuff I can't even get in America, much less Bowie!! So, what's a girl to do? Well, I am going to buy fresh veggies out the wazoo, low sodium boullion, fresh fruits, fish, and soy cheese (I'm gonna try it, although I doubt the stuff they sell at Bowie Wal-Mart is going to be worth poop) . . . I am going to TRY to limit my soda intake (I drink diet coke all day. I'm going to try to limit them to three a day . . . note I said TRY on this one . . .) and drink more water, I will cook chicken once or twice a week - only when the kids are here, and even then, I will probably eat something else. I will try to stay as far away from red meat as I can . . . Although I can have chocolate!! Dark chocolate - the darker the better. Good thing I LIKE dark chocolate!

*sigh*

Poor Ronnie . . . He DID say he didn't mind eating vegitarian occasionally . . .

I hope this works. If not, the next step? Lap Band . . . ugh . . .

Don't throw stuff. Please.

I am voting for John McCain.

Now, before you start throwing things at me, let me defend myself.

Barack Obama recently took a trip to visit the troops in Iraq. He blew off the soldiers. He went into the officer's tent and played basketball. He shook a total of three hands while he was there. All three were high-ranking officers. One of the men tried to say hello to him. He completely ignored the boy and walked on. He said nothing to any of these men and women that are risking their lives so we can even HAVE elections in November. He was snooty.

John McCain went to visit the troops in Iraq.
He shook every hand that was given him. He told every man and woman he came into contact with thank you - and even hugged a few of them. He cried with on man as he listened to the story of how this man watched his bunk mate die.

So, before you start throwing stuff at me -
Who would you rather vote for? A man who doesn't care about the men and women risking their lives in Iraq, or a man who does?

Playing Catch Up

This past few weeks have been CRAZY!! I feel like I have been running around like a chicken with its head cut off . . .

So now I get to play catch up. I have a TON of blog posts to read, and a TON of blog posts to write, and a ton of responses to write! YIKES!

I did get my school schedule worked out - YIPPEE!! I have 2 classes on Monday and Wednesday and one internet course. They are all computer classes, so hopefully I'll do okay in them . . . *sigh* WHY didn't I choose History as my second concentration instead of Computer Science . . . Dumb Jen . . .

SO now I'm off . . . cookbook writing, blog reading, getting my poop together . . . I hope!!

Blogger madness . . .

Wow, has it really been that long since I blogged??? Yikes . . . what kind of blogging mommy am I??

You know, Mommyhood is the toughest job on the planet. I don't care what anyone says. Working moms don't have it easy, per se, but they get a break from their kids. Me? I'm lucky if I get out for 30 minutes to go to Wal-Mart or Brookshire's by myself. I don't have me time. It is impossible for me to have me time.

On a positive note - Ronnie and I are FINALLY getting a much deserved and much anticipated DATE NIGHT!!! Woo-hoo - Thank you Uncle Sam for the lovely stimulus check you sent us - it will be well spent . . . LOL. M. Night's "The Happening" at the Rave and chinese food at Red Pepper's - can't get any better than that!!!

Another positive - my best friends and I are planning a trip to GALVESTON!! Sun, surf, relaxation . . . aaaahhh . . . SOOO nice to think about. The thing is, I really would love it if our significant others went - we all are married, engaged, or may as well be (AIMEE, LOL) - and to be honest, I've never been a night without Ronnie since we were married. I don't know if I can take that - me and my co-dependency . . . But that leaves another problem - babysitting . . . UUUGH - why? B/C just two weeks AFTER that is TRF! This is where we dress up in garb, go camping, and play pretend for a whole weekend. And I am NOT missing THAT for ANYTHING.

So . . . I'm torn. I finally get the oppertunity for a weekend away from it all . . . and I am seriously thinking about reconcidering . . . what is WRONG with me???

Another side note - I have decided to write a cookbook. Yes, I know, I have been "writing one" for a couple of years now. But now, I am really going to concentrate hard on getting it finished! Thing is . . . who would publish me? Well, as Scarlett says:

"I won't think about that today, I'll think about that tomorrow. After all - Tomorrow is another day!"

Moments that make it all worthwhile . . .

Yes. The duck is pink, LOL. He is saying Duck, by the way. How do I know? Because Ronnie is "Da" or "A-Da". Jacob is CLEARLY saying "Duh"!

I need a vacation . . .

You know, being a mom isn't easy. Being a mom that works is REALLY hard - but the bright side is that you generally get a break from the kids for at least SOME length of time. When school was in full swing, from August through December or from January through May, I am cheerful. Happy. I have no issues. I am not stuck at home 24 hours a day 7 days a week cooking, cleaning, chasing, changing diapers, diciplining, yelling . . . you get my point.

Summer stinks. Why? B/C I am currently home 24 hours a day 7 days a week cooking, cleaning, chasing, changing diapers, diciplining, yelling . . . you get my point . . . again.

I love my children. Don't get me wrong. And I LOVE being a SAHM - I wouldn't trade jobs with anyone. But it's HARD. Especially when you don't have a car. I can't even take the kids to the park. Sure, I could send them outside, but they come back inside 5 minutes later complaining that "It's to hoo-ot . . ." in that whiney way children have perfected since the 1st century. At least at the park, they don't have an option. But then, who can blame them, really, I mean it IS 90 degrees in the shade today, after all. And I can't be a hypocrite. I won't send them outside if I won't go outside. That would be just WRONG . . . Okay, well maybe not, but I would feel guilty as all get out.

Plus there's a little issue we're having with money. Yeah, that's kinda a constant, but about once or twice a month, we go through trying to figure out how we're going to scrounge up enough cash for groceries. I have meat in the freezer, pasta and cream soups in the pantry . . . I wonder if I have enough for casseroles and homemade skillet meals to last a week.

I had to go to wal-mart at 2 in the morning to spend $13 we don't have on a box of diapers b/c I had NO CLUE that we were out. THAT was an experience.

School starts in late August. Until then . . . well, you know . . . I need a mommy-break.

Proverbs 22:6

I am blogging today only because I feel I need to. I don't really have anything on my heart, but I felt I needed to put SOMETHING down . . .

Well, that's not entirely true. I have a LOT on my heart. Mostly child custody issues. I won't go into our story regarding that here, just because I'm not going to name names on the internet. If I know you, and you want to know what's going on, please feel free to email me and I will tell you all about it. Otherwise, sorry that I can't indulge you any more than that.

Funny that it's not just us -

My best friend is going to court on Friday to get full custody of her daughter.

My brother and his wife have decided to split up - there's going to be a nasty battle there, I can feel it . . .

It makes me ask - what is going on? WHY do people use their children as wepons? That's not why God blessed us with these little people!! We are supposed to love them, and nurture them and care for them . . . We are supposed to guide them in the Lord and in His ways and teach them about Him - WE are here for THEM -- NOT the other way around!

So WHY do these people use their kids to get back at their ex's?? I JUST DON'T GET IT!!! They are SCREWING their kids up for life - AND THEY DON'T CARE!!

It kills me to see children suffer for their parent's own selfish needs . . .

Proverbs 22:6 (NIV)
"Train a child in the way he should go,
and when he is old he will not turn from it."

THIS should be our focus. NOT child support, or making "the Ex" mad. WHAT'S BEST FOR THE CHILDREN . . .

I am so mad right now I could throw something.

How Time Flies . . .

I was looking at my children (well, the two youngest since the two oldest are at their mom's) this morning and it utterly amazes me how quickly time goes.

Emily is speaking plainly (if you ever knew her before, you would remember she has had quite the speech impediment). She is also reading 3 and 4 letter words (with help, although she's getting quite good at sight words). She loves to dance and sing, and makes up songs ALL the time. Her hair is down to her waist.

I remember, not so long ago, that I was so worried that her hair would NEVER grow, that no one besides me would EVER understand her, and I never imagined she would be reading. My baby girl is not a baby anymore. In just over a year, she will be in Kindergarten. I am in awe . . .

Jacob is crawling, pulling up, trying to move while holding on to fingers or the couch, has two teeth popping up, eating REAL food, and communicating somewhat with signs and gestures. I can't believe my son is eight months old. It seems like only last week that he entered my world. He has grown by leaps and bounds - he's already in 9-12 month clothes!

I am so enamoured with my children. I feel like God has blessed me so much.

Idiots "R" Us . . .

Okay, so the other night, I saw something that made me laugh all the way home from the Wal-Mart parking lot.

I was coming out with a basket full of groceries and noticed a couple of guys gunning their big ol' trucks around the parking lot. Just basically being loud and rude and obnoxious. You know the type, I'm sure. I sat there shaking my head with one word going through my head. As this is a family oriented blog, I won't express that word here, but let's just say it was less than flattering . . . LOL.

So, on my way out of the parking lot, I notice a crowd of people outside the gas station looking at something. Curious, I turned my head to see what had gotten their attention - then I started laughing my butt off.

One of the morons that had been gunning around the parking lot had lost control of his truck, and was stuck on the hill next to the bridge that went over the highway. I only wish I had been savvy enough to break out my camera phone so I could post the pick! It was the funniest thing I'd seen in a while. Now, if he had been hurt, I would have probably been praying instead. But he wasn't, so I found it extremely hilarious!

Goes to show you - God has a sense of humor too!

On To Creationism . . .

This is a rant. This is only a rant. Do not take this personally if I offend you in anything I say in this post.

That said.

Darwin was full of crap.

Even DARWIN thought Darwin was full of crap. (Lady Hope Story)

Evolution? HA!

Big Bang? Riiiight . . .


The one thing that makes me the angriest at the public school system of America is the fact that they are teaching Darwinism (thus - ATHEISM) to our children AS FACT! HELLO!! It's called the THEORY of evolution, people! NOT the "facts as proven by Darwin that we all ascended from monkeys . . .".

What makes me even angrier is the prospect of CHRISTIANS buying into this garbage!!
The BIBLE says that God created everything in six days.
Period.
It is not "symbolic" it is not "well, their concept of time was different then.".
It happened in six days.
How do I know? God said so. Who am I to question Him?

IF God created the world then where does evolution fit in? God didn't create monkeys and then take one and turn it into Adam. Nope. God created all the animals (yes, monkeys too) and THEN created Adam:

Gen. 2:7
"The Lord God formed the man from the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living being."

Does that sound to you like Adam came from a chimpanzee? Yeah, me either.

So with that in mind, how in the world can someone claim to believe the bible and then claim to believe Darwin too? The two contradict each other - they don't jive! They can't both be right, right?

So who IS right. Well, again, God said HE did it all, and as he is the Almighty, I really choose to not question him. In fact, I have this thing where if I read it in the Bible, I tend to believe that's the way it is. Yup. Even Noah and Jonah. Everything that Moses did? I believe it all 100% happened. Every bit of it. In fact, MOST Christians I know have these same beliefs. So . . . if they can believe everything else in the Bible happend just as it was written, then why is it so hard to accept the fact that the Bible is right and Darwin is (was?) wrong??

I will never say that people that have different beliefs than I do aren't Christian.

HOWEVER, I DO think that any "christian" that believes a word of Darwin's "theory" should REALLY re-evaluate their faith . . .

Would you like to learn more about the theory of creationism versus the theory of Darwinism? Click here for more info.

Anxioties and Creationism

I am freaking out over the prospect of my precious little one starting school. I was okay with preschoo, I could walk her to class, hang up her back pack, give her a kiss, give her a reminder, have a brief hello with her teacher, that kind of thing. Kindergarten? Different story. I have to leave my precious bundle at the front door (if even that close) to fend for her self with the possibilties of her getting lost, hurt, beat up, robbed, sad, have an accident, blow up in the middle of the hallway WHATEVER in the midst. Just thinking about it last night made me cry myself to sleep. What am I going to do? I know I can't be there for her ALL the time - she's going to have to learn to fend for herself in that dark, bleek jungle out there that we call the public school system. But it doesn't make it any easier.

See, I have two major fears. One, that my child will follow in her momma's footsteps and be an outcast. Two, that the school will fill my child's head with a whole lot of BS that I can neither fostor nor prevent.

Okay, so the outcast thing. This is why I'm worried.

I watch my child interact with other kids. She always seems to be the one shunned. She will be off playing by herself. "Emmy," I'll ask. "Why aren't you playing with the other kids?" "Because they don't want me to play." "Well did you ask?" "They told me to go away".

This happens every time. In school, at parties, at family functions, in the park. I just want to bawl my eyes out to think about it.

My little girl is the sweetest child on the planet (to other kids, anyway). She wants to play, and doesn't mind doing anything that anyone else wants to do. She just wants to PLAY. She is so beautiful and smart and sweet and I just want to scream to the world "WHY can't you see what I do in my baby??" Jake, I have no fears for Jake. He's a flirt (you should have seen that infant making eyes at his cousin yesterday, LOL). He's a tough kid. He'll be alright. Emily, well, she kinda wears her emotions on her sleeve. If they get stepped on, she'll crumble. We're working on this through Love and Logic Paranting (I'll go into more detail about THAT in another blog . . . after I finally get the book). But it doesn't change my fears. Maybe I'm too overprotective of her . . . but it breaks my heart.

Now, as for the other reason I am afraid of public school, that's another blog. Maybe I'll get to that later in the day. I'll leave you with this thought, though - Atheists rule our school's curriculum. Don't believe me? Read your child's science book when school starts. There is a particular theory that you will see is being taught as fact. The theory of creationism (here's a link for you to read up a bit) is not even being brought up b/c it is a CHRISTIAN CONCEPT. Hmm . . . don't get me started. I have to go make breakfast and a cup of much-needed STRONG coffee. I'll rant about that later.

I don't want to go to bed . . .

I am so tired that I can barely keep my eyes open, but my mind is whirling right now. So many things have gone on over the course of the past 48 hours, that I really don't know what to think.

One the one hand, I don't want to relay the story online b/c of possible reprocussions. On the other it is eating me alive to have all this bottled up inside me. Something so drastic may happen in the near future, if present conditions don't change. And I am scared. I am terrified. I am wanting to cry just thinking about the stress it will put on this family. It is nothing as drastic as losing a home or a car or being bankrupt. But it will put a strain on our home financially as well as emotionally.

I keep praying that God will send us a miracle.

Please pray for us.

Why I Don't Go To Church

Anyone that knows me will tell you that I love my Jesus. We have a very special relationship that I cannot put into words. Every day, I talk to him more than a few times. Sometimes, he gives me what I ask, sometimes he doesn't. But every prayer is heard and every prayer is answered.

It has been said to me (on a web group I am a part of) that I am not a REAL christian. "A REAL christian has to be baptized in the holy spirit and go to church."

Hmph. On a side note, did you know the leading cause of atheism is christians?

John 3:16:
" . . . He who believeth in him shall not perish . . ."

NOT
"Only he that were baptized and go to church every sunday . . ."

I don't believe this crap about "you have to go to church" or "you have to be baptized".

I read the bible. I pray. I have GREAT conversations with Christ. I have GREAT conversations ABOUT Christ! I have fellowship with fellow Christians on an almost daily basis. I have no fear regarding my salvation.

So what do I need church for?

I have found, in my personal experience, that 75% of churchgoers are hypocrites, and 9 times out of ten the PASTORS are hypocrites. I don't feel like I have to sit in a room surrounded by hypocrites and be preached to by a hypocrite in order for my soul to go to heaven.

Let me elaborate:

Exapmle one:
Recently (in the past year) I attended an area church. The pastor and his wife preach about gossip and how it is unGodly and how we shouldn't do it b/c it's a road to Hell, yadda yadda yadda.

Recently (in the past week) I saw said pastor and his wife at the local wal-mart. Mrs. Pastor had no problem telling me all the goings on in the church recently - I should say all the goings on of the congregation of the church. "so-and-so is pregnant, did you know she's not married yet?" "so-and-so just went into AA, i didn't even know he drank!" "so and so just got arrested for beating his wife - what's going on in the world today?" and so on so on so forth.

See? The one thing they preach out about the most and they are doing it right in the middle of WAL MART for God's sake!!

Example Two:

A church in Dallas that a friend attended for a long time had a retreat a few years ago in regards to keeping your marriage in tact. One of the seminars, led by the pastor, was about staying faithful to your spouse.

Less than a month later, the pastor's wife kicked him out b/c he was caught in bed with another woman.

Get my point?
Who are YOU to tell me that God doesn't want me to do something, when you are out doing it yourself??

Example 3:

I worked for a church for six years. I found out I was pregnant (I wasn't married) and the church decided to go ahead and keep me on even though it was a "public sin" as long as I didn't tell anyone I was pregnant. (oohh-kaaay). Then 9/11 hit. This church made a decision that would long affect it - even today, five years later. It decided it would hold a layoff.

The four people that were considered the biggest liabilities were laid off.

These people were:
A single mom with a special needs teenage boy.
A single unwed mother 8 months pregnant.
An older woman that had just been in a car accident and was still trying to cope with chronic pain.
A married mother of two small children who's husband had just been laid off.

I ask you, were these people LIABILIIES or the ones in the most NEED?
And this was a church, people!!!

Fact is, I love my Jesus, and I really don't want our relationship tainted, thank you very much, so I will continue to worship in the manner that I have been and fully enjoy that relationship.

By the way, for those "gung ho" in witnessing (I mean FORCEFUL witnessing) -
TELLING PEOPLE THEY'RE GOING TO HELL DOESN'T WORK!!
SHOWING Christ through YOUR actions DOES.

Another Kick In The Butt . . .

I like to say sometimes that God likes to kick me in the butt every now and again to remind me where my spiritual loyalty lies. My hubby's amazing cousin posted this link. For the past ten minutes I have been bawling my eyes out. This wonderful woman went through something that no family should ever have to endure. As I read her story I was amazed by her amazing faith in God. She took this challenge as God giving her an oppertunity to witness to others. Rather than asking "why" she only said "thank you". Eternally grateful for what she HAS rather than being bitter over what she DOESN'T have.

I really need to learn from this woman. I find myself asking "why" all the time. I find myself wanting MORE - always feeling that we don't have what we NEED or that we don't have ENOUGH, when the fact is, we have MORE than enough. We have more that a lot of people. We always have enough food. We have a roof over our head. We have clothes on our back. We have a car. We have friends and family that love us. And we have our children. Rather than whining about not having enough room, or not having enough "stuff" I need to step back and take notice of the beautiful things I do have.

We're KILLING our children!!

I just got off the phone with my mom. She went to my brother in laws the other day to see the kids. This was after school on a Tuesday or Wednesday. At three o'clock in the afternoon, my niece and nephew were both sitting at the table eating full bowls of MACARONI AND CHEESE WITH SMOKED SAUSAGE as a SNACK!!! And we ain't talkin' small bowls here, kids! My niece is in KINDERGARTEN!!!!! My nephew is in SECOND GRADE!! What in the WORLD is their momma thinking??? That was a snack, know what they were going to have for dinner? Spaghetti and meatballs! I was in awe.

The sad thing is, though, this is the NORM for today's society! I asked a few of my good friends on cafe mom what they fed their children for snacks and I got everything from mac and cheese to pizza!! No WONDER our children are the fattest kids on the planet!

Now, I admit, my kid is overweight. And I take FULL responsibility for that. She's an indoor baby. She loves to watch TV and doesn't get much active time. That is ENTIRELY my fault. BUT she doesn't eat a bowl of macaroni and cheese for snack!! She eats VERY healthy - low fat dairy products, whole grains, fresh or frozen fruits and veggies (well, the ones I can get down her). We rarely have cookies, cakes, pies, cupcakes, brownies, or candy in the house. (that's cause I would eat them all, HA!) But she's just not that active. Again - that's MY fault b/c I am not that active. There's also the fact that I don't feel comfortable with her going out side by herself to play, and I don't feel comfortable taking Jacob outside yet. I need to get over that, b/c she needs to get outside, and so does Jake and so do I for that matter . . .

But I digress . . .

The fact is, we live in a technological age. EVERYTHING is computerized, televised, IPodd'd, YouTube'd, MySpace'd. blogged, or e-booked. EVEN SPORTS, thanks to Nintendo!! But the sad thing is that the technology we so strive for is killing us! We spend hours upon hours in front of a TV or computer screen and wonder how we got to 200 pounds. We forget to go play catch with our kids in the backyard and wonder why our FIVE year old is 70 pounds! I guess it's up to us to make a decision that could impact the world. Get away from the computer, the TV, the PSP, the Walkman, the TIVO or WHATEVER and GO PLAY WITH YOUR KIDS!! Don't have any? Go borrow some! I'm sure you know a mom or two that will HAPPILY lend you theirs for an hour or two!

As for me? I'm going to go play with my children and my husband in the backyard until bedtime!!

It's Too Freakin' Early

So my wonderful infant son wakes up at 6 freakin' 30 this morning. No worries, I was just going to change him and give him a bottle and crawl back into bed to snuggle with hubby until everyone else wakes up at around 8:30. WISHFUL THINKING. Who should I hear come up behind me (talking almost as loud as possible) - my step son. I love my kids - all of them weather I gave birth to them or not. But I had NO intention of being awake at 6:30 this morning, nor did I have any intention of STAYING awake. But, of course, Jake decided "no bottle for me, momma - Garrett's up - it's time to PLAY". So here it is, roughly 8:05 my time and I have been up for an hour and a half on a Saturday on Memorial Day weekend. Niiice . . . (catch the sarcasm there?)

On the bright side, now I have an excuse to wake hubby up at 8:30 (if the loud children don't wake him first). I plan on getting this house CLEAN this weekend. Not just a little clean. I mean CLEAN clean. The I-can-eat-off-my-countertops-without-being-afraid-of-a-staph-infection clean. If I have to be the only one cleaning this weekend - it WILL happen. I am tired of the mess and the filth. For every five things I pick up, seventeen more remain. And MOST of it isn't even mine!! So I have decided we are going to become minimalists. Yup. Nothing I don't need is staying. I am holding on to a few baby items for my hubby's pregnant cousin (we don't know if it's a boy or a girl yet) but other than that - everything not necessary to life in our household is GOING. I hope . . .

Summer in the midst . . .

I love Summer. I really do. But I get so worried. Am I going to be able to handle Emily and Jake 24-7 and NOT lose my sanity? Not to mention the weeks that we are going to have Garrett and Christin in towe. I love my kids. All four of them. But I am so worried that I am going to want to kill them by the time school starts again!

Even today, Garrett and Christin are out of school today, so we have them until Monday. They are every so slightly starting to drive me banannas. Christin is helping a lot with Jake, but Garrett can't seem to NOT be argumentative with everyone - including me.

I have a TON of cleaning to do. My house looks like four tornadoes, a hurricane, and a land-fill hit it. My kitchen is not just nasty - its NAAAAASSSSTYYY . . . I have stuff on the walls and cabinets that I never noticed before Ronnie pointed it out to me. Hopefully this summer will bring control. I have to control the clutter and not let it control me!

So this summer should be interesting. I just hope I don't become the wicked step-mother!

By the way - Jacob sat up all by himself this past week! It was the coolest thing. Now, he'll yell ("Eh!!!") and make sure SOMEONE is watching him before he pushes up onto his tushie. Then he'll smile and go "Yeeeeah!!" and clap. LOL. He's so fun. I love having a baby again!

So . . .

I am so totally stressed out. My husband and I are getting ready for our big Renaissance weekend - and we are not sure if we are going to have enough funds for this AND the bills. I told him we'll finangle . . . somehow. I might not get my new bodice though. Funny, DH is dead set that i get it. I'm just dead set that we will have a good time at the Faire. I really don't care about the bodice . . . much . . .

But on top of that, my house is a wreck and I live with a four year old hurricane. I am not kidding. Right now theres not even any toys in her room and it's still a mess . . . go figure!

Maybe I should sell everything in the house that is taking up so much space . . . naah, then I'd get in trouble . . .

I love Fridays.

I love Fridays. Me and my daughter get to snuggle in bed for as long as we want - or until Jake wakes up. I did all the housework on Thursday, when I didn't have class, so it's pretty well a lazy day to cuddle and watch tv and bake cookies.

Today is Ronnie's birthday. I SHOULD have bought a cake mix to do his cake. Or at the very least gotten the stuff to make it from scratch with. But this week we were on a very tight budget. Come to think of it, until the rebate check comes from the government, we are on a very tight budget. Bless his heart, he works so hard. Sometimes it almost feels like it's for nothing, though. We're ALWAYS behind on SOMETHING. Mostly, that's my fault. I will put off paying a bill so we don't get overdraft, then I forget. And half the time, wouldn't you guess, we go over ANYWAY . . . It's a never ending circle.

But I digress . . .

The point of the post is FRIDAYS
I love Friday.

We don't have to go anywhere, and we don't have a car even if we DID, LOL. It's kinda nice. Just me, Emily, and the baby . . . all day long . . . with no car . . . geesh, I must be wacko . . .

Being a "Supermom" . . . ?

I have kept blogs on sites like myspace and cafemom, but I never imagined that I could keep a good blog that was nothing but a blog. I really like this idea. It's kinda like a public journal . . . hmm . . . my personal life put out there for the world to see. What a novel concept. I hope no one's opinions change about me . . .

So why am I a supermom? LOL, honestly I don't know. My wonderful husband calls me that. I don't know that I am, though.

I go to school (when I'm not sick, my kids aren't sick and the car works).
I take my daughter to preschool.
I cook dinner.
I grocery shop.
I attempt to clean, do laundry, etc (when I feel like it).
I pay bills (when I remember them).

Does that make me a supermom? I don't work outside the home. I don't drive anyone to football, soccer, dance, cheerleading, baseball, or hockey. I don't have 50,000,000 things to do on any given day.

Maybe I'm NOT a supermom . . . hmm . . . what do you think?