Thursday, May 17, 2012

TMI Friday! Are You Mom Enough?

That's Right, Kids!
TMI Friday is BACK!
And this weeks topic is sure a hot one - 
and fits right into the TMI logic.

Picture Courtesy TIME Magazine, Copyright 2012.

Is there anyone on the planet that has not seen this magazine cover?
The image of a little boy suckling on his mothers breast is not one that I expected, nor desired, to see when I took my four year old to the grocery store. 
Now, let's get one thing straight here, I am 100% in support of breast feeding your child whenever and wherever. 
Within reason.
If you're still breast feeding your kid when he's four, that's you're business.
But please, let's leave it as your business.
I don't believe that breastfeeding a child that big in public is appropriate, AT ALL.
And quite frankly, the possible psychological ramifications from nursing that late really disturb me.

And to go even further, it's not so much the image on the cover that offends me.
I think it's a little strange, and I'm really horrified that the media would use such an image solely for the sake of stirring up controversy (which was exactly their intention). But it doesn't offend me.
What offends me is the implication within the article that I am not a good enough mom because I chose to not be an attachment parent.
No, I am not, never have been, and never will be an attachment parent.
First of all, my kids are way to independent.
Secondly, I really want my kids to learn how to care for themselves.
I am not going to be there when my kid is 18 and in college to nurse him or her to sleep at night because they had a bad day.
While I can see the benefits of attachment parenting to a certain age (like, 2), beyond that, I honestly believe it can do more harm than good.
We are raising a generation of children that will wrongfully believe the world revolves around them.
Their reality will be skewed and they will not be prepared to handle the real world that involves things like solitude, loneliness, and even losing every once in a while.
Additionally, the psychological ramifications that will come from boys growing in to men that have been attachment-parented for a long period of time. He will grow with the unrealistic expectation that any woman he marries will be as perfect as his mother - or even a second "mother" to him.

I certainly hope that extreme attachment parenting is a fad and goes away soon.
For the sake of the young men of America.

Alright ladies and gents, that's my soapbox for the week! How do you feel about this topic? What's you're opinion? SOUND OFF!


misssrobin said...

I'll admit I found the cover disturbing. I nursed all my babies and thought I was pretty open minded. But once your child can speak, it's time to let them be a separate person. I definitely worry about the psychological effects. For both the child and the mom. I believe some moms do it because they think it's good for their child. I believe others like how important it makes them feel in their child's life.

I believe in fostering independence. I am there when they truly need me, but I also want them to know they can get by on their own. I also want them to learn to expand their support circle so they can ask others for help when I am not available. I want them to be comfortable living interdependently with those around them.

I have five kids ages 13, 15, 17, 19, and 21. They're doing great and we have a good relationship.

I'm with you on your soapbox. said...

totally talking about this on my blog tomorrow, and I agree with you!

stopped by from SITS

Jenny said...

I'm usually a "to each his own" kind of person but I did find this cover a bit disconcerting. I just find the whole attachment parenting thing very hard to understand (and I nursed my middle child for 2 years)!
Thanks for stopping by to make my SITS day so special.